Doctor Mommy

My 2 y/o has asthma. One day, she was wheezing pretty bad. I told her "Sweetheart, you are wheezing. Let's give you your breathing medicine." Then I gave her a breathing treatment via her nebulizer. After her treatment I listened to her lungs, having her breath deeply. Then I said, "Wow, your lungs sound soooo much better!" with great enthusiasm. She looked at me and said, "Thanks Doctor Mommy!"

Grown-up Juice

I love being a Mom! And my dear daughter says and does the cutest things. Aside from asking to trick or treat a few times a week because she had such a blast Halloween weekend, she's a comedian! The other day, we were eating dinner and I had a glass of wine. She said, "Mommy, can I have some?" I said, "No baby, drink your apple juice." She said, "But mommy, I want your apple juice!" I said, "Oh, no honey, this isn't apple juice, it's....grown up juice!" She said. "Oh. There's grown ups in there???" I just LOVE my lil' diva.

Perscription Fraud

Okay, so I work in a very small town. It's just me, the Receptionist and the RN most times. We have funding for a medical assistant. Had a great one for a few months who became really sick with her pregnancy. Then we had a new girl. Lets call her Ms. Hyper Viper. Very enthusiastic, hardworking, gets the job done type. Almost overly enthused always asking "What can I do? Can I help? Can I do anything else" type of personality. We'd joke with her about her being on speed or needing something to calm her down. It is so great to have a medical assistant to spread out the work load since we do a lot of patient assistance programs and various other programs requiring lots of documentation for funding and grants - takes a lot of stress off of our nurse.

Today the MA came in looking kinda sick - tired. I asked if she was okay and she said she was. Soon after she said she was throwing up so we had her go home.

I got a call from a pharmacy in one of our neighboring towns calling to validate a perscription that was written over the weekend. The name? Hyper Viper. It was for 2 controlled substances, one of which I NEVER perscribe, each with two refills. Had "my" signature (forged), but the wrong DEA #. I told the Pharmacist that I did not write that and not to fill it but he said it was done over the weekend (when he was not there) but he would cancel out the refills and tag her file. They faxed me a copy.

I feel so violated and betrayed. She must have practiced my signature because it was close. She no longer works here of course. I wonder if she's done this before. I wonder how many blank scripts she may have and how many pharmacies she may have gone to. I'm so upset right now.